Dark In My Mind
by Mini-Moffie13
Summary: "You'll never know unless you try it, Captain." he breathed as he shoved him against the wall. After an accident aboard the Enterprise Spock has been acting more and more strangely, it is like he is two different people rolled into one. But when Jim is the only one to notice he finds himself the centre of Spock's attention, and that might be the most dangerous place to be.
1. Chapter 1

**New story here I come! It is set after Into Darkness, and I am going to be trying a bit of angst along the way which is new to me so if anyone wants to give me some tips feel free they are welcome!**

**Chapter One: Breaking In:**

"Damn it." Jim muttered as he walked swiftly down the corridor, passing members of the crew on him way the Captain spared little time to offer an acknowledging nod of his head to them or a forced smile. Stress levels were at a high once again, and his patience was wearing thin, he wanted answers and he wanted them now.

The glass door which stood between him and the Medical Bay slid open with a gentle hiss of depressurised air and allowed him admittance; dodging an assortment of nurses the Captain hastened towards his friend. The Doctor was sat behind his glass desk, apparently analysing something or other on his PADD.

"Bones, you called?" he asked, resting his hands loosely on his hips.

"Jim! God damnit man, don't sneak up on me!" Bones sighed, "You got here faster than I anticipated you would, I haven't had time to run through all the tests results yet. I'm a Doctor not a miracle worker you know?"

"Bones, Bones... Bones!" he yelled, snapping him out of his self-indulged ranting, "Where is he?" his voice betraying the concern his face had concealed.

McCoy let out a sigh and jerked his head to the left, gesturing to the half-glass, half-white-cobalt private bay, "I've had to keep him in isolation for the time being because of the delay in getting back his test results. He hasn't woken up yet but his statistics are stable as far as I can tell, there is no real reason why he _shouldn't_ wake up."

Jim swallowed thickly as he followed his gaze and looked through the glass, "Can I go in and see him?"

"I wouldn't recommend it, not until I get the results back, Jim-" Bones trailed off and sighed, "Alright, but I will have someone watching and making sure that he doesn't start eliciting radioactive matter, alright?"

"Thanks Bones."

The blond donned a card around his neck which would permit him to see whether or not he was in danger of radioactive poisoning, if it changed colour from green he was in trouble. Then, he set his phaser on Bones's desk and followed the physician towards the isolation bay.

Jim stepped into the glass and cobalt bay, hearing the door slide shut behind him before he blew out a breath and strode towards the bed; he took to the only chair in the room and moved it to the bedside. Leaning forward, he rested his arms on the bed sheets and sighed as he looked him over, "Oh Spock, you trying to give me a coronary?"

"_We are experiencing a little turbulence Captain," Chekov informed him as the young man's voice was echoed by a loud rumbling which shook the ship._

"_Yes, thank you Chekov, I had noticed." Kirk muttered as he staggered to his seat, "Raise shields. Uhura tell Spock to get his ass back up here and off that planet. We can't stay here any longer, it's not safe."_

"_Yes sir," the xinolinguist answered before she touched the transceiver in her ear and tried to contact the Vulcan._

"_Scotty, how are we holding up down there?" the Captain asked as he buzzed down to engineering._

"_Not great Captain, I cannae keep the engines boosted to Warp Speed for long before we have to actually use them otherwise they'll backfire and blast us out of the sky."_

"_Understood, do what you can and keep me informed." He sighed._

"_Will do!" the Scotsman said before he cut their conversation off._

"_Captain! Lieutenant Spock is ready to beam aboard!" Uhura told him, turning in her seat._

"_Very good." he said, standing quickly before he headed for the elevator, "Chekov you have the con, be ready to evacuate the area."_

_Jim jogged along the hallways, meandering down to the transporter room to meet his First Captain. So far everything about this stupid mission had been damned, first the engines had gone into flux, requiring for them to fire up the Warp Core constantly to maintain power; and then Spock had beamed to the surface of the planet they were circling to get soil and rock samples they needed to analyse... Something, he hadn't really been listening. And then a radioactive storm cloud had shot up from the planets' surface and almost decimated them where they flew._

_Shaking his head, Kirk slowed as he reached his destination and headed into the room just in time to see the first sparks of particles as Spock beamed aboard. That was when the ship rocked again and the usually golden particles turned red as the alarms began to blare and the transporter failed, Spock's figure disappearing for a moment before it reappeared and Spock crumpled on the ground unconscious._

Jim sighed and ran a hand down his face, he stood up to leave when he heard a soft indignant groan from the bed; his head snapped around and a smile formed on his face as he watched Spock's almond shaped eyes flutter open for the first time since the accident.

"Spock?" he asked, leaning over the man and resting a hand on his shoulder as he came around, "Thank God, you sure had me worried this time my friend."

"C-Captain?" the Vulcan questioned, wincing at the lights in the bay as his mind caught up with his body, "What happened?"

"Do you remember anything at all?" Jim asked, "When we tried to beam you off planet there was a malfunction because of the storm cloud, the first transport attempt failed but rebooted and you were beamed aboard, I'm guessing it was the strain of the first failed attempt but you've been unconscious for three days."

"Three days?!" the Vulcan exclaimed in an unusually high-pitched tone.

"Calm down, we don't want you to get aggravated again," he said gently, smiling at him, "Bones has been covering your work load with some help, you just need to focus on getting better, can't have you collapsing on duty."

"I apologise for my state of disuse Captain, I-"

"Spock," he interrupted, "Just worry about getting better."

"I... Yes Captain."

-/-

Whether he was fully better or not, Jim wasn't sure, however just the next day Spock was discharged from the Medical Bay and returned to his normal duties despite McCoy's very best attempt at keeping him off sick. Regardless of his concern, it was nice to have his First Officer back at his side, Bones wasn't the same bless him.

"How are you feeling?" Jim asked as his friend came to stand beside him on the Bridge.

"I am absolutely functional, Captain, you need not be concerned."

"Well at the very least you sound more... Vulcan now." He sighed, "You were so much more innocent in your sleep." He added teasingly.

Spock frowned and looked at him, "Did you stay with me all night Captain? There was really no need..."

"You stayed."

"I'm sorry?"

"When Bones brought me back..." he paused and looked at him, "After everything with Khan... You stayed by my side the entire time I was in that coma after the radiation... You never left. Bones told me Spock... You stuck by my side. How could I not do the same for you?"

The Vulcan opened and closed his mouth, "I... Captain that was different, you _had_ died."

"And you _could have_ died!" he barked under his breath, looking out of the large screen at space, "I would be just as lost if you left me as you would if I left you."

"We are certainly interdependent, I will agree with that, which is amusing considering how we began." He agreed with a sigh.

"See, future you was right."

"It would appear to be that way."

The pair fell silent for a moment before the blond cleared his throat, "Have you spoken to Uhura yet?"

"Why would I have?"

"She was worried about you too..."

"Lieutenant Uhura and I are no longer together Captain, I do not desire to present her with the wrong idea but... Being out of character." He explained in a detached manner.

"Wh-What? When did that happen?" Jim spluttered in surprise, glancing at the linguist who had her back to them both.

Spock glanced at the blond before he sighed and clasped his hands behind his back, "This morning."

"Why? How? Are you dealing with it?" he fired off without really meaning to pry.

"My feelings towards her have changed over the course of the past year, at first I was uncertain what it meant however after my... Near death experience I came to the logical conclusion that I no longer feel the way I did and have little desire to continue our... Relationship. So when she visited me this morning I ended things."

Jim frowned and folded his arms, "Why... Why did you never say anything to me about this? I would have thought you'd talk to me about it..."

"Why would I talk to you about it? I am capable of making my own decisions. _Captain_."

Kirk paused at the way in which his friend said his rank and he looked at the Vulcan curiously, there was something different about his entire mannerism, and it was a little unnerving. He was sure it was just down to him re-establishing himself after the transporter accident; he'd settle down in a few days and return to his usual self. With this in mind he passed the Vulcan and returned to the Captain's chair, sitting down and crossing his legs as he pressed his fingertips together and watched the stars flying past.

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Spock move, hesitating for a moment beside him before he disappeared to his own chair. Jim swallowed the lump which had formed in his throat and tried to set the eerie scene to the back of his mind so that he could concentrate.

They were on their way to New Vulcan with the samples Spock had collected. Bones had refreshed his mind on the mission at hand, apparently the Vulcan Ministers of the Science Academy were unhappy with the planet they had found to restart their civilisation and were reaching out for something better. Personally he didn't understand what the problem was; New Vulcan seemed perfect, even Spock had seemed at peace there.

When the communication device fitted to his chair buzzed, it almost made him jump because of how little he had expected to be disturbed so soon after settling into his seat; with a lazy sigh he pressed a button to answer the call.

"Captain Kirk speaking." He greeted in a platonic tone of voice.

"Jim, you need to come down to Medical, like right now." Bones said, his voice was panicked and worried which set Jim off.

"On my way." He muttered, cutting the call and standing up, "Spock with me, Sulu take the con."

The two men walked side by side in silence, retracing a route they had both taken many times since they had joined the Enterprise; not that it ever got boring but it would have been nice not to have to make the trip so many times that they could have walked it with their eyes shut. Once again, Kirk felt a peculiar sensation reeling from his First Officer and a glance toward him from the corner of his eye confirmed that Spock had been watching him with slightly less friendly eyes than normal.

There was something not quite right with his Vulcan companion. He was going to have to keep an eye on him in case he had a relapse after the accident.

Walking into the Medical Bay, both men froze momentarily as they encountered something similar to a bomb site; desks and shelves overturned, paperwork scattered and PADDs shattered and broken; glass had been smashed and now covered the floor like a thin sheet of ice.

"Bones!" Jim exclaimed, "What the _hell_ happened?!"

"I have _no_ idea!" the Doctor growled, his eyes narrowed with anger, "I _just_ got back from my lunch break and found it like this... Someone dismissed my staff so there are no witnesses, the cameras were knocked out so there is no recordings and there are no fingerprints either... Someone completely turned this place over and... I have no idea who!"

"Logically speaking, Doctor, it had to be someone aboard the ship so that at least narrows down your list of suspects." Spock interjected.

"To what? Anything from eight to nine hundred people?!" he barked, "I'm missing half of the new results which had just come in... I haven't been able to analyse them and now they are missing... This is just..."

"Calm down Bones, we'll find out who did this. What sort of results are missing?" Jim asked.

McCoy sighed and let out a breath, turning away and sifting through what was left of his desk, "All the results pertaining to the tests I've run in the past week. Even Spock's are gone."

"Alright, well these things are tagged aren't they? So we'll trigger the alarm attached to them and find them."

"I already tried that Jim... They didn't show up as being on board the ship anymore... Looks like whoever took them did so for the purpose of concealing what was among them. I think they've probably been thrown off the ship." He sighed, throwing his hands up in defeat as he righted a chair and sat down heavily.

The Captain cursed under his breath and glanced around at the devastation, he didn't know of anyone among his crew even capable of committing such an atrocity against the Doctor; even fewer who would actually want to. Why couldn't things be normal for once?

"Try not to worry Bones, we'll get it all straightened up and functional again and then... Track down the person responsible." He said, concealing the fact that he believed it unlikely that they would find the person responsible at all.

"Yeah, whatever, you know as much as I do that without any witnesses or evidence the chance of actually finding them is nil." The man grumbled.

"Just... Try not to worry. Okay?"

Jim sighed and turned to Spock, blinking and looking around as he found the man to be gone; he opened his mouth to say something before he changed his mind and shook his head, leaving the Medical Bay as he left orders for several volunteers to head down in his place and assist with repairing the damage.

'_Damnit Spock, where did you run off to this time?'_ he thought to himself, wondering what Spock's test results had been. He shrugged, they'd never know now.


	2. Chapter 2

**Thank you for the lovely response to the first chapter, I hope you enjoy this one just as much :3**

**Warning:**** There is some mild implications of a sexual nature mid-way through, nothing overly descriptive though.**

**Chapter Two: Twins:**

The next day, Spock didn't turn up for his duties and no one could get into his room to find him and tell him. Jim put it down to the stress of the accident, although he was well aware that the chances of Spock suffering from a stress related illness was almost as small as the Vulcan becoming a court jester. It just wasn't going to happen. Ever.

Nevertheless, he allowed it to slide, and with no Spock to keep his wild side in check, he made several rash decisions and got shouted at by Uhura, who apparently blamed him for Spock breaking up with her. He had no idea how she had come to that conclusion but trying to tell her otherwise had led to a barrage of slaps and further shouting. Not a scene he wanted repeated. Ever.

He could not deny that he actually missed the man's company on the Bridge, as much as they argued and clashed they had basic and primal similarities such as dedication; strength; and desire to protect their family. They could and would argue about many things, but not those three. In those three things at least, they had an absolute understanding.

And he kind of enjoyed their spats; it was grounding to know that he had someone as strongly willed as himself by his side. He liked being challenged, and Spock did that constantly, and then to quash the opposition with his own signature brand of logic. And it was never dull.

With a sigh, Jim finally conceded to the will of his crew and went to see for himself if Spock was alright or not.

The walk through the hallways of the ship was always a repetitive one, but it was one he always enjoyed and never tired of. This was the adventure he had dreamed of as a child, he knew not all were so luck as to live their dreams.

When he came to a stop outside of his First Officer's room, he realised he had never been there before, usually when there was trouble it was his own room which was invaded by one of three people: Spock, Bones, or Scotty.

Chuckling at the thought, he knocked sharply at the door and waited several minutes, he shifted his weight from one leg to the other as he waited before he finally decided that he wasn't going to get an answer and overrode the locking mechanism with his pass code.

He lifted his gaze as the door hissed gently and opened, the room was shrouded in darkness, the lights were inactive as there was almost no sound from within, save for the gentle pattering of water in the bathroom. Spock was in the shower then? That would explain why he hadn't heard the door but not shower took half a day, so why had he not heard his other visitors?

Jim stepped inside and glanced around out of curiosity. The set up was the same as his own, merely slightly smaller, yet the curious thing was the lack of personal objects and belongings. The room looked almost clinical in its maintenance. His own room was plagued by memorabilia from his voyages, photographs of San Francisco, mostly of him and Bones at the Academy and graduation; a couple of motorcycle magazines and some vintage replica models which he kept in a glass cabinet for safety.

But Spock's room was void of any such things, the only two things which appeared out of place were a navy blue jumper folded neatly on the bed and a potted plant, half of which was blood red and the other half of which was purple.

He reached out and brushed the velvet soft leaves of that plant curiously, he had never seen one like it before.

"Gemingreen, Captain," the Vulcan said as he leaned against the doorframe of the bathroom, "Given its name for its dual personality, 'Gemin' as in Gemini the star sign of the twins. The red half provides a calming and natural sedative while the purple acts as a powerful aphrodisiac. They are common to Vulcan alone, this is the only one of its kind left."

"Yet its' very name is a contradiction of its nature... Gemingreen." Kirk proposed as he looked over his shoulder at his First Officer, blinking in surprise as he found himself looking at his pale bare torso which still glistened with the aftermath of cascading water.

"I am pleased you appreciate the irony." Spock said, his lips twitching only slightly as he walked forwards, brushing passed his Captain and heading for his wardrobe, "So, what can I do for you Captain?"

Jim opened his mouth and released a volley of gibberish before composing himself, "... You didn't show up for your duties and no one could get hold of you."

"So you came to find me yourself?" he asked, looking over his shoulder with an arched Vulcan eyebrow.

"Is that really so strange?" he asked, already knowing the answer.

"Yes."

Jim looked away, "I was concerned about you, after what happened yesterday I thought perhaps you might have collapsed or something..." he explained before he sniffed indignantly, "However I can see that you have not so I will leave you in peace." He said and took several steps towards the door.

"You were concerned?" Spock repeated curiously, brushing his hair down before his hand travelled to the towel around his waist.

Kirk felt shame wash over him as his eyes followed the path of the Vulcan's hand before he tore his gaze away and looked straight over his friend's head, "I think we have established that friends are allowed to be concerned for each other's wellbeing."

The blonds' back stiffened suddenly as he felt the warmth of Spock's chest pressing against his back, he swallowed and turned slowly, coming face to face with the dark eyed male.

"Of course, I apologise for doubting you, Captain." The Vulcan breathed.

"No problem Spock, I'm used to you second guessing me." He shrugged it off and tried to appear nonchalant about it.

Tipping his head the other raised an eyebrow again, "But it does bother you."

"You challenge my command, we are both very dominant personalities, I find it difficult to submit to your will. As we both found out when we were going after Nero, I couldn't let myself be ordered around, even less for someone I had very little respect for at the time."

"So you feel threatened by me? But at the same time you keep me here as your First Officer? You enjoy the challenge don't you?"

"Of course, it wouldn't be as fun if everyone simply did as they were told. You question me, make me question myself and it makes me strive to do better." He explained.

"You said that you could not submit... Why?"

"My pride, my personality. I am not the submissive kind. I've never met anyone who could make me yield. It is just the way I am Spock. I never submit to anyone."

"You'll never know unless you try it, Captain." he breathed as he shoved the blond against the wall, pinning his arms above his head in one of his hands as he pressed against him fully.

"S-Spock!" he exclaimed, his eyes widening slightly as he saw a darkly malicious look in the other's eyes.

"Yes?" the Vulcan asked, his voice dropping several pitches to a husky level.

He squirmed slightly, "Release me at once, I am not playing games Spock. It is an order!"

"You don't mean it. I can see it in your eyes, feel it in your pulse, feel it in the quiver of your heart." He whispered as he leaned in, brushing his lips along the length of the other's ear.

Jim swallowed hard, "Spock... Let go of me, now." He said, forcing steadiness into his voice as he tried not to react as his friend's teeth sank into the shell of his ear and drew blood, as well as a hiss.

"I don't want to, _Captain_." He purred before his free hand snuck down and suddenly grasped the front of Jim's trousers between his legs, fondling him a little roughly through his clothing and eliciting a gasp of surprise from the blond as his hips jerked forwards in response to the contact.

Kirk let out a reluctant groan as he was touched intimately, his legs turning to jelly as he lifted his gaze and found himself staring into those dark irises. Something was definitely different about the Vulcan, there was an obscurity in his eyes which had never been there before, usually his eyes betrayed him and his humanity, but currently they were predatory and they made Jim's spine melt.

A loud knocking on the door beside them saved Jim from a fate he was uncertain he was ready to face and as Spock sighed and withdrew he was left to correct himself and eradicate the flush from his face.

The Captain shoved Spock back and slid pressed the release button on the wall, watching as the door slid open to reveal Bones's face. Never before had Jim been so damned relieved for his old roommate to interrupt him when he was being manhandled.

"Bones! What can I do for you?!" he asked almost too eagerly.

"What are you doing here Jim?" the Doctor asked before he shook his head and looked at Spock, "We've been able to restore the Sick Bay so when you are ready I want to re-run the tests from yesterday and see if there is any damage we missed."

Jim was reluctant to follow them to Sick Bay, the memory of Spock's body pressed against his own lingered in his mind; he was merely thankful that his ear had stopped bleeding from the painfully hard nip it had received on the end of Spock's teeth.

A shiver ran over him, why his body continually tortured him by recalling every touch the Vulcan had pressed upon him, he was sure he did not know.

Shaking his head, he endeavoured to avoid all forms of contact with the Vulcan; he didn't want to encourage any further leching from him, especially not in front of McCoy.

He couldn't understand what had come over Spock; he had _never_ seen him like that before. Yet he couldn't quite shake off the feeling of slight arousal which he had been partial to in the wake of having his control seized and taken from him in that heart-stopping moment when he had been pinned so forcefully against the door and groped.

Rolling his eyes as his trousers tightened slightly in response to his train of thought, Jim groaned under his breath and dared o glance sideways at his First Officer, which proved to be his mistake as he found that those dark eyes were already fixed on him. His back stiffened instantly and he opened his mouth to speak before he tore his eyes away from him and looked straight ahead, now able to feel his gaze upon him constantly the hairs on the backs of his neck were on end and he felt a tremble run over him like a bucket of cold ice had been tossed over him.

Entering the Sick Bay, Jim watched as Spock headed over to one of the beds and sat down on it; he turned to Bones and pulled him off to the side, "Bones... Something is wrong with him."

"What are you talking about Jim?" the Doctor asked as he gathered several phials and syringes that he needed.

"I am telling you that there is something wrong with him," he repeated, hissing slightly as he gripped his friend's wrist in an almost breaking hold, "Just before you knocked at the door he had me pinned against the wall with his hand between my legs, Bones, he was dominant and dark and commanding... He was not the Spock I know."

McCoy stared at the hand on his arm for a moment before he lifted his gaze and saw the concern and reality in Jim's eyes, had he not seen that he would have accused him of lying, but he could see the truth of his words, "Are you being serious?"

"Yes. I wouldn't lie about this Bones, you know that. I am... I am really worried." He told him in a hushed whisper, "He's my friend and... If I lost him it would tear me apart."

Conceding to this, Bones nodded once, "I know it would. Try not to worry Jim, I'll run these tests and depending on the results which come back we can work on what to do to help him."

"Alright... Are you going to keep him in?"

"Yeah, overnight observations I think; I'll also run a psychiatric examination to test for alterations in his personality and mental stability. Go and get some rest, everything will be fine."

The blond stepped back and watched as his oldest friend headed towards the Vulcan with the equipment he needed to run his tests; despite what he had said he was still worried. What if there was something seriously wrong with Spock? What if they couldn't help him or... Or worse what if helping made it worse? One thing was for sure and that was the fact that Spock could not be allowed to remain as he was, he wasn't sure he would survive another assault on his control.

-/-

Later that night, Jim lay asleep in bed, his torso exposed as the thin grey sheets scrunched around his waist and down his legs; a thin sheen of sweat covered his naked skin, glistening in the light of the stars which filtered through the window beside his bed.

He had long ago discovered, after his first trip into space, that he could no longer sleep without seeing the stars which had prompted the change in set up to his room. His bed had formerly been tucked out of the way around the corner, out of sight of the window and it had made his restless. But moving the bed into place beside the window had ended his sleepless nights, the stars settled him and comforted him like a blanket of safety, despite the dangers that space contained.

However, on this night for the first time in years he found himself to be restlessly fighting for sleep. When he found sleep it was plagued with flashes of his past, his childhood and teenage years - memories which were both unpleasant and nightmarish for him and when he woke he found himself to be so exhausted that he could barely keep his eyes open for more than a few seconds, yet he forced himself to do so in hopes of eradicating the thoughts of a lifestyle which he had long since escaped.

Other times he dreamt of Spock. It both concerned and embarrassed him that the Vulcan was haunting his sleep; with recollections of his firm taut body pressing hard against his own arousing and shaking him to his core. Such recollections caused further restlessness because of the reoccurring partial erections he experienced as a result.

He had considered himself to be completely straight, he had always found men to be attractive, but he had never desired to experiment. Yet Spock had ignited something within him with sent his trembling to his core, and not only that, for the first time he was anxious that he was not as dominant as he had formerly considered himself to be.

Opening his eyes slowly, Jim sighed heavily and ran a hand through his hair, sitting up in bed and giving into the fact that he couldn't get to sleep peacefully. Instead he pulled out his PADD and looked up the plant Spock kept in his room, the Gemingreen, just out of curiosity.

'_The Gemingreen takes its name from the Zodiac star sign Gemini, symbol of the twins and dual personality, this plant is a rare species which is native only to the planet Vulcan because of its climacteric requirements. It needs to be kept in a hot temperature which far exceeds that of most habitable planets, and it also requires little water but plenty of tending to. It is often considered that the Gemingreen is the signature plant of Vulcan society because the two are so intermingled and it could not survive without the dedication of a Vulcan emissary to tend to it daily._

_It is possible to maintain the life form off planet as long as it has a Vulcan master tending to it, as they are the only culture to truly understand its needs and requirements._

_There are two different types of Gemingreen: the first being the red and purple version which depicts the use of sedation and aphrodisiac while its iconic twin, the blue and orange version is used for healing and repair to the mind. The sedation version is by far the most common [amended]: There are only two plants left in the entire universe after the destruction of Vulcan, one plant of the sedation family and one plant of the healing family; to the knowledge of biologists around the universe both of these plants remain in the care of dedicated Vulcans who are determined to prolong the existence of the Gemingreen for as long as possible.'_

Kirk raised an eyebrow and tilted his head as he came to the end of the article, he had never been overly patient with plants but this one sounded pretty interesting. He found it ironic how there were two versions of the plant, considering their namesake was the patron of two personalities; it amused him further to know that there were only two of them left in the world, and that they were different versions.

Ironic how that happened. Different personalities and skills.

Scoffing slightly he put the PADD aside and laid back down, closing his eyes as weariness overrun him again and he finally settled into something of a normal sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Sorry for the slight delay in updating this story, I have been really addicted to updating To Leap Without Looking (my other ST story) so I hope the wait was worth it! And a huge thank you for your wonderful reviews, I hope you continue to enjoy the plot line!**

**Chapter Three: Desires:**

Jim had never been so irate as he was currently, his dreams were constantly plagued by Spock and his dominating persona while in his waking hours he encountered the Vulcan, who ironically was on his best behaviour, never again having given him a heated or lustful look as they worked side by side. Not that he minded, at the very least he didn't seem to need to worry about being jumped by his friend while they were on duty. However, well, that was only partially true, part of him _wanted _to be jumped and taken advantage of; part of him wanted to be worshipped under the other's hands. Yet, his overwhelming need to be dominant himself constantly made him feel guilty for his desires. It was an impossible situation!

Several days had passed since the incident in his room, and ever since Spock had been perfectly normal; perfectly logical and not at all like the confident and powerful man he had encountered. He both longed to see him again and feared his return. Nothing about this scenario made any sense to him anymore.

What was worse was that the tests run by Bones had turned up negative. They stated that there was nothing wrong with Spock; making Jim appear paranoid, and Bones had fully taken advantage of that to tease him no end; he had almost reached the end of his tether. He couldn't understand why Spock had changed so much, seemingly overnight: going from overbearingly sexy and commanding to being his usual damp and logical self - it was driving him wild. He wanted to believe that Spock was simply playing hard to get, but he couldn't manage it. No, he had seen no sexual flare in the man's eyes at all since that evening in his room; it was like Spock was a completely different person.

Sitting back against the wall, Jim stared out of the window beside his bed again, sighing wistfully as he stared at the glistening stars; he couldn't fathom why he felt so damn upset that Spock had since lost interest in him. Alright, that was a lie he knew damn well why he was upset about it. He had _enjoyed _feeling helpless and vulnerable, he had _enjoyed_ having his dominance stripped from him like a layer of unneeded armour. It had been arousing and sensual and so, so perfectly done.

It did, however, disturb him that it had led to so much desire for the Vulcan whom he considered to be a good friend but... Nothing more than that. Spock was a pain in the ass at the best of times, but to actually desire him in such a way... It was confusing and his brain was muddled. He wasn't sure what to do, whether he should confront of his friend or leave it be. Seeing as Spock seemed to have forgotten all about it, perhaps he should do the same.

Groaning, Jim finally got to his feet, disappearing into the bathroom to get washed before his shift began. He was still tired and slightly irritable but he knew now that he _had_ to talk to Spock, he would go insane if he didn't talk to him and find out what was going on in the man's head. Even if it was tense and awkward, he was getting the truth and he was getting it today.

Showering quickly, he tried to construct a conversation in his head so that he knew how to confront the situation better. But he was coming up blank, he hated not having some rough around the edges kind of plan just to assist him and ease the process. Seemed like he had no choice this time however.

As he dressed several minutes later, Kirk brushed himself down and ran a hand through his damp hair, ruffling it out off his head in a messy yet stylish manner; then he adorned himself with his phaser, and communicator and left his room, seeking out Spock as a matter of priority as he stalked the corridors of his ship.

He still adored simply walking the corridors, it still felt like a dream that the Enterprise was _his_ ship, his baby, his home and his nest. Without a doubt it was the most important possession he laid ownership to, and if he ever lost the Enterprise it would probably destroy him. It had very almost ruined him when he had been removed from Command after the events just prior to Khan's terrorism attack on the Head Quarters of Starfleet; he owned Pike a hell of a lot and he still wished the man was alive to grow to be proud of him again. The thought that he had died ashamed stung his heart to this day.

Jim came to an abrupt stop as he turned the corner and came chest to chest with the very Vulcan he was looking for, his breath hitched in his throat at their impossibly close contact and he swallowed, feeling his mouth go dry as he looked up at Spock with slightly widened eyes; his breath coming in short and shallow pants which did nothing to calm the sudden violent thumping of his heart in his chest.

"Captain." the Vulcan greeted, and was the first to step back to provide some more room between them.

"Spock!" he said, forcing forward his overzealous personality to conceal his surprise at the sudden encounter, "What are you doing skulking about?"

"I was hardly skulking Captain, I-"

Kirk rubbed his forehead, "Spock... I was joking," he sighed, "How are you feeling now?"

"I am fully functional." he responded, "Thank you for your concern." he added as an afterthought.

"Anytime..." he muttered, looking away as he considered a way to bring up what was on his mind.

The Vulcan got there first however, "Captain, I feel I must apologise for my actions a few days ago, I was not myself a the time; I hope I have not offended you."

"Uh... No... No not at all..." the blond cleared his throat and looked away, "Uh... That was what I wanted to discuss with you actually. Have you been yourself since? No strange turns or... Anything?"

"No I have been perfectly normal." he answered, "I think it was a combination of shock and perhaps some underlying injury sustained during the accident. I am fully functional now however."

"Good... Good I am glad to hear it. Well... Anyway, I'll leave you to get on with your duties." he said, trying to ignore the faint disappointment which had settled in his belly as he walked past his First Officer and headed down the hallway.

Jim looked around as he felt someone walking beside him and he frowned slightly as he found Spock to be following him, "Spock... Shouldn't you be going to the Bridge?"

"To be shouted at further by Lieutenant Uhura? I think I will remain away for a little longer." the Vulcan allowed a small chuckle to escape him before he cleared his throat, "Captain, are you alright? You did not give me chance to ask in response."

"Heh, I can sympathise with that. For some reason she seems to be believing that it is my fault you split from her... I can't understand it to be honest but then again who ever understood an angry woman?" he shrugged, "Huh? Oh, I'm alright. Just tired."

"Have you not been sleeping well?" he continued to probe.

Rubbing his forehead restlessly, he sighed heavily, "Not particularly no, I've just got a lot on my mind at the moment. It's nothing I can't handle Spock. Don't worry." he forced a weary smile.

The Vulcan frowned faintly and quirked an eyebrow, "Perhaps you need to discuss what is on your mind? I hear it is helpful to some people to discuss what is troubling them. I am willing to listen."

"Seriously? Me talking to you about my feelings? I don't think that will go too well to be honest." he chuckled, "Thanks anyway."

"Then perhaps you need to learn how to meditate so you can shut out these disturbing thoughts?"

_'Easier said that bloody done Spock...'_ he thought venomously, "Yes maybe that would be wise!" he laughed sarcastically, "Can you seriously imagine me sitting still long enough to learn how to meditate? Come on Spock you know me better than that!"

Silence impregnated the air between them for several moments before Jim suddenly felt a cold shudder run down his back and he looked around sharply out of preservation instincts; he stopped dead as he saw that familiar predatory look in his friend's eyes and his mouth went dry, his heart skipping a beat as his pulse sped up and his breathing grew laboured. A zing of heat shot through him like an electric shock as their eyes locked and a second turned into a life time as it seemed increasingly impossible to break the contact between them.

Jim swallowed the lump which had formed in his throat as he tried to tear his eyes away from Spock's only to fail and feel heat flush his face with a pink tinge as he was left feeling like a skittish teenager. What the hell was wrong with him?

"Are you sure you do not desire some assistance Captain?" Spock all but purred stepping into Jim's personal space fearlessly.

He was once again reminded of a stalking lion hunting its prey as he looked at the intense lust in Spock's dark eyes, "I'm fine." he half squeaked, highly unimpressed by the high pitch of his voice, he cleared his throat and tried again, "I'm fine Spock." he repeated, glad at least that his voice was a little more normal again, "Honestly, there is nothing to worry about. I'm just going to act like normal and grab some extra hours when I can."

"That is hardly good for your health." he argued, his hand shooting out and pressing against the wall beside the Captain's head, trapping him between the wall and his strong Vulcan body, "You need to rest properly _Captain_ or else you will be no good to anyone."

_'Oh not again,'_ Jim thought before he felt his breathing almost stop completely, "No need to worry Spock, I have everything sorted. Energy pills and caffeine are the answer. Quit worrying." he patted him on the chest in a friendly manner and hastily ducked under his arm, walking off _very_ quickly.

Barely having recovered from his encounter, Jim found himself on the Bridge where he was grateful that Spock could not continue his assault against his self control. There was only so many times he could say no, okay? He wasn't invincible. He was a _man_ and _men_ have needs... And Spock was doing everything in his power to damn well impinge on his _needs_ with every damn breath he took! It was driving him to distraction. Undoubtedly he would no be haunted by the memory of the Vulcan's hand slamming against the wall beside his head as he slept, creeping in on his personal space and safety zone. If he wasn't careful he was going to end up being severely caught off guard.

A groan escaped him under his breath as he took to his seat, glaring out of the window at the stars a he gathered his confidence and his shattered pride. He needed to... Wait, what the _hell_ was he playing at?! Had he just _run_ _away_ from his First Officer like a skittish school girl?! Bloody hell he had! Damnations he was acting like a scared virgin. Why was he running from Spock? It wasn't like the Vulcan was unattractive, in fact Spock was very attractive and he had always found himself curious about just how sensitive those pointy ears were under the duress of a pair of teeth. Maybe it was just the way Spock was acting that bothered him, the fact that he knew something wasn't right with him; was that why he was keeping his distance? Was he trying to be chivalrous?!

_'Oh my God! I'm worried about his pride! I don't want him to do something he'll regret... What the hell is wrong with me?! Normally if I want something I just take it. But now Spock is displaying some... Highly erotic personality traits I am trying to be nice? I must be out of my mind...__'_ he found himself thinking as he heard his friend enter the Bridge; he looked around slowly, his eyes meeting Spock's as heat coiled in the pit of his stomach and a prang of desire shot through him as they stared.

In that moment, Jim couldn't help considering all the dark and despicable things he wanted to do to that Vulcan body to completely and utterly debaucher his friend. Oh Gods he wanted Spock.


	4. Chapter 4

**Thanks for the fantastic reviews and responses to this story! It is boosting to a rating of 'M' with this chapter for a reason, I like to be surrounded with a safety net when it comes to writing smut :P Enjoy my lovelies!**

**Warnings: Spock X Jim smut**

**Chapter Four: What Was That?**

It was three in the morning, as far as morning could be disconcerted aboard a space ship in the middle of space where there were few sunrises and even fewer sunsets. Jim was leaning against the wall of the shower with his eyes closed and the gentle warm spray sluicing down his taut; muscular body as his sleep deprived mind wandered among the stars outside his ship. He was truly losing his mind in the face of aggravation and tiredness. For three weeks he had gone with just a couple of hours sleep a night, leaving him exhausted during the day and irritable to work along side. He knew he was taking his frustration out on his crew and he hated himself for doing it but he simply _could not get any decent amount of sleep_ because of the damned Vulcan who continued to pray on his dreams. Even in his waking hours he no longer found peace.

Everywhere he went, Spock was there, watching him with a most perplexed expression. It was like the man didn't know what he had done. It was insane and it was crazy and it was driving Jim around the bloody bend.

For the three weeks he had been suffering fatigue at the most extreme level, Spock had not approached him in that feral; sexually predatorily manner in actual fact the Vulcan had been his usual self with no further imposing on his personal space. It was both a relief and a strain. He wondered what had happened to make him start being like that in the first place; and then he wondered what had happened to _stop_ him from being like it.

He would be lying if he said he was one hundred percent happy that Spock was back to normal. Jim had... Well, he had _enjoyed_ the attentions of his First Officer, and to suddenly be devoid of them left him feeling a little empty and a little bit rejected. Not to mention, regardless of the lack of actual attention he was still having his dreams haunted by the man.

With a heavy sigh, Jim finally pushed away from the wall; completing his bathing session he climbed out of the shower and grabbed the closest towel, patting his skin dry before he stared at himself in the full length mirror in the bathroom. He looked tired, there were growing black circles under his eyes from the lack of rest he was getting and his skin was slightly peaky.

Groaning at the effect a few short, aggressive encounters had had on him he stalked into his bedroom and pulled on his uniform, thoughts of sleep now gone for another long day as he strapped his phaser in place and strode out of his room, heading for the Bridge to take over. It had become a regular occurrence for him to appear on the Bridge only a few hours after leaving for the night; something the night crew had become almost too accustomed to.

At the very least, he had the pleasure of McCoy's company during these times; the Doctor's insomnia permitted him to keep him company and it was something Jim was grateful of. At the very least he still had one of his friendships intact; considering he was almost too afraid to speak to Spock at the moment let alone spend a night on the Bridge with him Bones was his second and best option.

As he was announced onto the main deck by the Lieutenant covering for Chekov, he balked as he saw the damned Vulcan he was trying to avoid sitting in his chair, apparently having assumed the role of Acting Captain while he had gone for his eight hours of sleep.

"Mister Spock, I'm surprised to see you here at this time of the night." he greeted as he made the ascension of the two small steps to the Captain's seat, swallowing the lump in his throat which had appeared upon seeing the pointy ears and peculiar hair cut of his First Officer.

"Captain," the Vulcan responded as he stood up fluidly and turned to face the blond, "I assumed I would find you here sooner or later, Doctor McCoy saw fit to inform me that you have not been taking your proper rest period, as such I thought I would-"

"Catch me in the act? Blood Bones! I should have known he couldn't keep his damned mouth shut." Jim muttered venomously.

"The Doctor only did what he believed best given the circumstances. You are at risk of making yourself ill Captain, you need your rest and at the moment you appear to be avoiding it for some reason. May I ask what is troubling you?"

"No, Mister Spock, you may not." he answered blandly as he nudged him out of the way and sat down with a grumpy plop.

The Vulcan raised an eyebrow and turned to face him again, "You have been irascible and prickly for weeks, you have been taking your ill-temper out on the crew and your friends and if you do not stop it this instant the Doctor will remove you from your duties until you are fit to return to them."

Jim's head snapped around and his eyes narrowed, "Are you threatening my command, Spock?" he asked in a growl.

"No, I am merely expressing my concern."

"Don't be such pig. It's your fault I'm like this anyway." he snapped without thinking about his words first; the moment they left his mouth he regretted the conversation that they were going to invoke.

"Excuse me Captain? I do not understand how I can be to blame for your inconceivability to take the required number of respite hours." the Vulcan stated in his usual analytical mannerism, "I cannot be held accountable for your misconduct."

"You pointy-eared _bastard_-" the blond swore as he got to his feet, gripping the front of his friend's blue jumper before he glanced sideways at the crew members who had turned to watch the display; placing a cork in his temper he released his First Officer, "Take the Chair." he told a random pilot as he walked to the elevator, turning at the doors and looking at Spock, "Get over here." he commanded, his voice livid.

As they stepped into the lift together, Jim watched the doors slide shut felt the pod begin to move, he pressed one of the buttons on the wall and felt it judder to a stop mid way between floors and he turned to his friend with an expression half way between anger and murder.

"You were _taunting_ me for days, heated side glances and lingering touches and then suddenly nothing for weeks! Have you _any_ idea how confusing that is?! What the _hell_ is going on with you Spock?! Talk about running hot and cold!"

"I am sorry Captain, but what are you talking about? I do not believe I am aware of what you are implying." the Vulcan said with a quirked eyebrow and a slightly bemused expression.

"What-?! Oh you had better be discovering a sense of humour Spock!" he barked, running a hand down his face.

"Vulcans do not have a sense of humour, as jest would be a sense of emotion which our race has long since purged itself of."

Jim let out a growl and without warning spun on his heel and punched Spock right in the side of the face, with enough force to make the man stagger and almost crumple; as soon as he regained his composure the blond faltered, "Damn it... Spock," he swore and winced as his knuckles burned, he reached out to steady his friend and sighed heavily, "Sorry... You didn't deserve that." he muttered.

"Oh, I think I did." the Vulcan answered.

The blond froze at the change in Spock's tone of voice and without warning he found himself pinned against the wall of the elevator; there was no room between them and his friend's breath was hot and heavy against his neck and shoulder, sending tingles of shivers up and down his back as he felt him pressing so firmly against him. Jim couldn't supress a small moan of delight as he found himself so vulnerable at the hands of the pointy-eared being.

"S-Spock..." he gasped out as he attempted to repair his shattered pride.

"Not listening at the moment." the Vulcan answered before he leaned forwards slightly and brushed his nose along the line of the other's jaw.

"Ahh..."

"Mm, you are so receptive, _Captain_." he purred as his mouth moved up against the shell of his ear tauntingly, "Far more so than I had believed you would be."

Jim wriggled slightly, his lips parting slightly as he sucked in a breath; his heart racing with excitement and arousal as he was pushed against even more firmly than before, their groins grinding pressed together; sending erotic thoughts through his already wicked mind. The Captain practically mewled as Spock bit down on his ear, causing a prickle of pain and further sensual awareness raking through his body; he barely supressed another moan as he allowed his head to roll to the side, presenting his throat to the other willingly.

"I was surprised when you threw out such a dominant façade on the Bridge, yet so soon you melt under my touches... I suppose I should feel honoured, yes?" his eyes glimmered darkly as he skimmed his lips down the long line of Jim's throat, savouring the feeling of his skin quivering under the grazes of his soft lips.

"Gah... I was... Pissed off with you..." the blond said a little incoherently as his brain began to get slightly muddled by the overload of sensation, a zing shooting straight to his most intimate parts as one of Spock's chilled hands appeared under the dual layer of his jumpers, pressing against the flat flesh of his abdomen; caressing and tickling while also stimulating heated responses from the rest of his body.

"Because I hadn't paid you any attention? I had given up, you kept running away from me..." the Vulcan purred against the hollow of the other's throat.

Squeezing his eyes shut as the taunting hand disappeared suddenly, only to appear rather forcefully between his legs, groping at the material covering his slightly hardened crotch; a whimper escaped him as he responded to the assertive fondling action, "What do you expect? We are friends... And suddenly you... Ahhh... Start showing an interest in me... Like this?"

"I've always had an interest in you _Jim_... It's just until now, I couldn't express it." he answered, smirking slightly as he began sucking firmly at his skin, rolling his hand firmly between his legs and savouring the feeling of his hardness straining against his palm.

"W-What?" the blond spluttered, his face flushing.

Chuckling lightly, the First Officer leaned up and brushed his nose against Jim's, "Only you have noticed my strange behaviour, Jim, because I have allowed you to see it. Who do you think sabotaged the Sick Bay? Who do you think stole my test results?"

"You did that - Ahh..." Jim swore and hit his head on the elevator wall as his toes curled slightly in his shoes, "Damn it... Spock!"

Leaning in that little bit further, he brought them eye to eye, "Because _Spock_ is only half here."

Jim's eyes widened slightly in confusion and he opened his mouth to respond, his back arching as instead his mouth was claimed by the man before him and he was orally dominated by the man's tongue; he melted into him as his arms flew up and encircled his shoulders, holding him impossibly closer as he lifted one of his legs and wound it around the Vulcan's waist, his mind going numb to everything else as he felt a cool hand invade his trousers and curl around his heated flesh. Oh by the Gods, he hoped this wasn't another one of his Spock _infested_ dreams.

Breathing heavily through his nose, the Captain moaned wantonly into the Vulcan's mouth, his tattered dominance falling like shredded paper around his feet as his trousers were almost ripped open for better access. Yanking his mouth away from Spock's he gasped openly for breath which was too quick to leave his lungs again in the wake of the heightened heat which spread across his skin, shudders raking his frame as he was massaged and caressed with increasing pace and speed.

Their teeth knocked as they met in another passionate exchange of kisses and battles, Jim groaned deeply as he felt his stomach wrap itself in knots as his climax drew in close; he ran his fingers through Spock's hair, tugging harshly on the locks as his hips jerked towards the continual contact and the ministrations he was receiving with pleasure. When he could take it no longer, he threw his head back; mouth falling open in bliss as stars burst in his vision as a mind-blowing orgasm washed over him, wiping away all conscious thought as he released over his First Officer's hand and relished the euphoric sensation of falling into a soft dark blanket of unawareness and completion.

He was roused not long after from the feeling of delightful tranquillity in the aftermath of such a cataclysmic climax by the sensation of having his trousers fastened back up before the elevator began moving again and without warning Spock abandoned him as soon as the doors opened, leaving him wondering what the hell had just happened.


	5. Chapter 5

**Thanks for the review for the last chapter it was an amazing response from you all! Spock was an absolute jerk as many of you pointed out. This chapter is a little shorter, I am not going to lie - I had some real problems finding the motivation to write it so please be patient and be nice ^^**

**Chapter Five: Black Hole:**

As the doors opened, Jim looked out and felt himself go stone still as he saw Spock stood just outside; they shared long look before the Vulcan entered the elevator along side him, the doors closing again as the pair finished the final leg of the journey to the Bridge. It seemed to take an eternity, Kirk found himself glancing at his friend a little awkwardly as recollections of their last elevator ride together played through his mind, sending a throb of heat to his loins. When he saw the Vulcan slowly look around at him, his expression one of smug superiority he felt warmth flood his face and he looked away sharply, clearing his throat and swallowing hard. His lips came ajar slightly as he lifted a hand and tugged at the collar of his jumper to give himself some relief from the abrupt rush of humidity washing over him. Eyes darting to the side again he found himself being drawn to Spock's neck and shoulders, his gaze trailing over the man as he remembered the feel the skin of his face under his finger tips.

His gaze snapped up suddenly as he saw Spock move and he faltered as they locked eyes and he shuddered as a silent tremor passed through him, "How are you Spock?" he asked a little weakly.

"I am perfectly functional." the Vulcan answered, "And... You?"

"Oh, I'm... I'm fine..." he said, shuffling on the spot and looking away, "... From the tone of your voice... I'm going to guess that you finally remember what you did to me?"

"Yes... I... Captain I do not know what came over me... I honestly do not know what I was doing, it was as though I was not in control of my actions, I feel _remorseful_ for my actions and if you feel the necessity to file a report and a transfer for me I would understand completely." Spock said suddenly.

Jim gawped for a moment before he cleared his throat and shifted his weight from one leg to the other, "I am not going to transfer you." he stated calmly, "I'm not going to file a report either."

"Captain?" the other said uncertainly, his slanted eyebrows furrowing slightly in confusion.

"I do, however, want an explanation." he told him sternly, glancing around as the doors opened to reveal the Bridge, "You can report to my room after your shift to do so." he added before he walked out, taking over from one of the pilots on duty as he slid into the Captain's seat and began giving orders to the crew.

-/-

When Spock did arrive outside of the Captain's room later that evening, he was in full grasp of his faculties and knew that he would have to tell his Captain and his friend everything. It was going to be embarrassing, it was going to be mortifying and it might even end his career. But he was not one to shy away from responsibilities and he had a responsibility to his Captain to give him the answers he needed.

He called out to the blond, and despite hearing no reply he watched as the door opened at his touch and he went inside. The Vulcan found his friend to be sat at his desk, staring slightly blindly into space; he cleared his throat loudly and watched as the man jolted out of his daydream and got to his feet.

"Sorry Spock... Didn't hear you come in."

"I noticed Captain." he answered.

Jim hesitated for a moment before he ran a hand down his face and came to rest both hands on his hips, "I guess we should sit down-"

"I would prefer to stand." Spock interrupted, "If you are not opposed to it?"

"Not at all... Whatever makes you feel comfortable." the blond sighed and leaned against the wall, "So... What has been going on with you Spock? I know I don't have to order you not to lie because Vulcans are incapable of doing so, but I do want the full truth."

The Vulcan hesitated and clasped his hands behind his back as he let out a sigh and wondered where to begin, "You recall my plant?"

"Yeah, the aphrodisiac and tranquiliser thing?"

"Indeed, the reality of having two opposing forces trapped within one formation, one the one side the tranquiliser which calms and relaxes the user while the aphrodisiac excites and arouses..." he trailed off and moistened his lips with a swipe of his tongue, "Split personalities so to speak."

"What has this got to do with... Oh... Oh I see," Jim straightened up slowly, "You believe you are suffering the same problem? You think you have a dual personality issue?"

"I am almost certain of it Captain, I had been analysing the things you have said to me and the things others have told me about my own behaviour. Apparently, I have been highly irregular with my attitude and almost intimidating. These are qualities which are unlike my usual self. I believe the only conclusion based around the facts given is that I have a split personality which has begun to infiltrate my life and affect my... Actions."

"But McCoy found nothing on the results..."

"The results he needed were on the first set which were lost, I believe. By the time he came to take the second round of tests any abnormalities had receded. I have begun to remember sketchy details of what my other self is doing, including the incident in the elevator... With you Captain..."

The blond felt his cheeks heat up and he shuffled, "I seem... That would make sense, but usually a dual personality is formed by experiencing some traumatic, the extra self forms as a protection agent to try and shield you again the trauma you've seen. You have had no such encounter."

"I think the malfunction with the transporter is to blame. It is after that everything began." Spock suggested, "I am uncertain what can be done to supress the other side of my personality, but I know it cannot be allowed to roam freely. However a the moment, it appears that the slightest thing is causing it to come forth."

"Like when I struck you the other day... Your other self responded to my dominance and inspired to... Put me in my place so to speak." he sighed, running a hand through his hair, "At least you have begun to remember things, that might be the key to getting... You back."

"Perhaps. It is possibly that a brain scan might reveal something, I was considering referring myself to Doctor McCoy." the Vulcan said a little feebly, "If I am removed from my command then it will prevent anyone being endangered by my... Change."

"I think the alternative you would be angrier if you were removed from your command actually..." Kirk muttered, "And I am not sure I would be too pleased to experience and _angry_ alternative you."

"What should I do Captain?"

"Try to remain in control, meditate or something. If it doesn't improve then we will consult Bones." he said, turning his back on him slowly as he considered the ramifications of what was happening to his friend.

Spock opened and closed his mouth before he frowned, "And what about... What happened Captain?"

"Forget about it Spock, it's fine." he told him with a sigh, "Didn't mean anything after all, it was just your other self putting me in my place wasn't it?"

"I..." the Vulcan fell quiet before his shoulders tensed, "Aye Captain." he agreed before he turned and left the room.

Jim let out a breath he hadn't realised he had been holding and glanced over his shoulder as he heard the door shut, "Of course..." he looked down and headed toward the replicator to grab himself a meal before his evening shift began.

_"Captain."_

The blond turned around suddenly as Spock's voice returned and he raised an eyebrow at the Vulcan stood in the doorway, "What is it Commander?" he asked as he turned away from him to finish his meal.

"You seem displeased by the association of my actions to be related to any emotional connection. Is that the case?"

"Not at all, you're imagining it." he told him blankly.

"I am not so sure that I am," he made several quick steps forward and gripped the blonds' arm, spinning him around to face him, "You never meet someone's gaze when you lie to them Captain, the bigger the lie the less you look at them. You weren't facing me; therefore I can assume it was a big lie. You are bothered by my... evaluation."

"Fine, you know what? Yes I am bothered by the fact that it didn't mean anything. And do you know why? Because your damned alter ego was pestering me for weeks! Showing interest in me and making flirtatious glances in my direction and I was preening under that attention and then you... I guess I've never been on the end of someone's disinterest. Don't worry about it Spock, it wasn't your fault. I should be taking it out on you and- Mpff!" he broke off suddenly as their mouths met and he gasped slightly, his eyes slipping closed after a moment as they shared a flurry of kisses, both feather light and heatedly heavy.

He felt Spock's arm slide around his waist and he was pulled closer against the man, the heat rose in his body just as it had done in the elevator; he found himself arching against him and snaking his own arms around his neck, pulling him in close and throwing caution to the wind as he fought for dominance against the Vulcan. This time, not stunned by the suddenness of it all, he revelled in the taste of his First Officer as they kissed: mint and vanilla essence. It spurred him on and left him wanting more as Spock pulled back and began running wet pecks down his neck.

Despite knowing he probably should have been paying attention to the fact that Spock was once again acting differently, but right there and then he really didn't give a damn. All he cared about was the fact that heat was blossoming from the other's touch and he was enjoying it. A moan escaped him as Spock's strangely skilful lips found a sensitive patch on his throat, close to his jugular; he swallowed hard as the other pulled back and their eyes met amidst the flourishing desire between them.

Spock reached up and slowly trailed his fingers down the side of Jim's face, his dark eyes searching the other's blue ones before he leaned in and claimed his mouth again, their lips meeting hungrily and eagerly as their tongues entwined and they staggered away from the replicator and the counter and towards the centre of the room, bodies pressing closely and hearts thumping madly as their passions spiralled and contorted.

Jim let out a gasp into the other's mouth as the backs of his legs connected with the edge of his bed and he felt himself falling back, hitting the mattress before Spock appeared over him; the blond reached up and cupped his face in his hands before he pulled him down into another kiss, his hands sliding downwards slowly before he grasped the bottom of the Vulcan's jumpers and pulled them up, revealing his taut torso in one movement. It wasn't long before his own jumpers joined Spock's on the floor.

"Is this you or him?" the Captain breathed as Spock leaned down again; he looked up at him with an unreadable expression as the Vulcan stopped in his tracks.

"A mixture of both perhaps." he answered after a moment, "While Spock is not in control I am certainly not experiencing any desires for you which he does not share."

Jim absorbed the information before he leaned up and crushed their lips together again, deciding either way, he didn't particularly care at that moment in time. He knew what he wanted and as long as that was reciprocated he didn't care. Spock was still Spock. Right?


End file.
